Subterranean Beefworks

helping a friend

So I have this friend, okay? And he really likes this girl. He's not me though. Heavens no. But I've talked with him a lot about this, and I just don't know what to say anymore.

He says it's not fear of rejection that keeps him from pushing for something serious with this girl, as much as I find that hard to believe. He explains that it's hard to risk everything there is now. There is stability now, and things aren't weird at all. There's no pretexts and everytime she stops by, he gets a joyful little thrill because of how she holds his glance before leaving. To approach her with how he feels could fuck all that up.

I try to explain to him that it's no much of a deal. She's an easy going, intelligent girl who seems above the obvious immaturity of cutting someone off because of an unreciprocated crush. I try to tell him that she's given a lot of great signs that she's not repulsed by him and that although they have tons of shit in common, they have tons of shit that isn't in common. Those are all ingredients for interesting time together.

He always comes back with the same thing though. "I'm waiting for an opportune time." He explains that he can't just drop it in her lap that he likes her. And understandably, he can't be planning his day around creating opportune moments. I feel bad for him because it's such slow going. It seems on the surface to be so plausible, so potentially great. But then at the same time, so hard to bring together.

Every week is the same cycle. A bunch of meaningless encounters, maybe something interesting on some odd wednesday. Then the weekend, which always seems like the best time--for him--to make a move. Then Sunday comes, everything quiets down and he's back to square one. I don't know what else to tell him. I guess it really does come down to a little outside luck and an opportunity that isn't missed.

He's got to realize that whatever happens with this, has to happen damn soon. With winter break and less than 2 semesters remaining, something has to happen soon. He knows this. He says every time that goes through his head, he gets this rush of motivation to do something. It just fizzles before there's a good chance.

He and I are both getting sick of talking about it. He knows he needs to do something soon, I have nothing more to tell him. Apparently she said she would 'be around later to talk about astronomy' but he went out to dinner and ended up playing pool until midnight. Now she's 'inaccessible.' He needs to grow a fucking spine.

Whatever. I'll keep you updated about my friend's progress.

Posted by Alchemae at October 24, 2004 11:54 PM